Teens and Holiday Plans

Has your normally bubbly, playful and affectionate child turned into a mumbling, withdrawn and secretive teenager? Does s/he now hide behind headphones blasting rock music into the deepest recesses of their brain? Does your teen communicate only by cell phone or online? Finding yourself a parent of a teen can feel like a rude awakening - especially when you are planning a family trip for the holidays.

Here are a few tips for successful holiday planning with teenagers:

* Include your teen in the decision-making process you may be pleasantly surprised at the maturity of their opinions.
* Make sure there are plenty of options and activities to keep your teen interested and entertained.
* Never expect anyone older than 10 to eat at the "kids table.".
* Teenagers want to be as relaxed and as undisciplined as the adults. Allow them the freedom to sleep in, stay up late, play hours of video games or to just listen to their tunes - this is supposed to be their holiday too.
* If all else fails, give them some money and take them to the mall to do holiday shopping. Of course I don't recommend allowing them to run amok unsupervised unless they are in the latter half of their teen years - and then they should be providing their own money.
* Let them eat what they like. This is no time for nagging about good health and nutrition.
* Never ask your teen how they liked the trip unless you are prepared to hear about what they didn't like. Let them be honest without taking offense.
* Let go of control. The point of having family get-togethers is supposed to be to enjoy each other's company, relax, and to create happy family memories. Don't mess it all up by attempting to hold onto rules with an iron fist.

Take solace in knowing that soon it will be January and they will be back in school - having not done their homework.